That's the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and you're just a reflection of him?
It's that moment of dawning comprehension I live for.
I'm learning real skills that I can apply throughout the rest of my life...Procrastinating and rationalizing.
"A day can really slip by when you're deliberately avoiding what you're supposed to do."
"It's a magical world...let's go exploring!"
Reality continues to ruin my life
They only recognize greatness when some authority confirms it.
I say, if your knees aren't green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life
Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.
I don't need to compromise my principles, because they don't have the slightest bearing on what happens to me anyway.
Calvin:Dad, how do people make babies?
Dad: Most people just go to Sears, buy the kit, and follow the assembly instructions.
Calvin: I came from Sears??
Dad: No, you were a Blue Light Special at K Mart. Almost as good, and a lot cheaper.
I think the surest sign that there is intelligent life out there in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact
There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want."
Some people are pragmatists, taking things as they come and making the best of the choices available. Some people are
idealists, standing for principle and refusing to compromise. And some people just act on any whim that enters their heads.
I pragmatically turn my whims into principles.
Well, remember what you said, because in a day or two, I'll have a witty and blistering retort! You'll be devastated THEN!
From now on, I'll connect the dots my own way.
Oh look, yet another Christmas TV special! How touching to have the meaning of Christmas brought to us by cola, fast food,
and beer conglomerates. Who'd have ever guessed that product consumption, popular entertainment, and spirituality would mix
so harmoniously? It's a beautiful world all right.
I think we dream so we don't have to be apart so long. If we're in each others dreams, we can play together all night!
"It's hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning."
"If warped values are the price of a vicarious thrill, so be it!"
"I'm yet another resource-consuming kid in and overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue
and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you're old and weak."
If something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway.
It's not denial. I'm just selective about the reality I accept.
Homework, I command thee, BE DONE!
Things are never quite as scary when you've got a best friend.